March 2012

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March 2nd, 2012

elusive_lustre80: (Default)
Friday, March 2nd, 2012 02:25 am
I use to scuff at the notion of suicide. I didn't understand it. I often thought it was weakness. Giving up, not just not getting the attention they need.

After all these years, I think I finally understand.

Not everyone does it for the same reasons, so I can't speak for everyone.

There comes a point where you're just tired. Tired of feeling pain. Tired of crying for no reason. Tired putting up walls, only to finally let someone in and they cut up your insides like it's no big deal. Like you don't matter. Tired of fighting to keep yourself sane when the whole world is just messed up. Tired of feeling like you have to fight, like you have to keep it together, like you have to be normal. Tired of letting your feeling control how you behave.

You're just tired.

So....I'm just tired. I'm tired of all these things. I'm tired of feeling like the way I am is a curse. I'm tired of feeling this way. I'm just tired of living.